Short jokes
I called my dog 5 miles.
Today, I fawn over my miles.
My ex's love for me :(
I still love the dude sadly, but I won't take him back.
Did you hear about the song Rihanna wrote about the tin can?
It was called "S & N."
Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids.
"Knuckle babies" don't eat.
I'm going to piss on the floor.
Read if gay.
Aha!
haha why couldn't the bike stand up because it was too tired.
Read this and you're gay.
Depression has been entered into your body.
what do you call a shadow stalker REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
I'm a fat cow.
Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to go and have some fun.
Silly Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son.
How many orphans does it take to "test drive" a bus? It depends on how much space the orphanage has and how much space the cemetery has.
Jack and Jill ran up the hill to pop some pills,
And Jill said, "Jack can do her without here will," and Jack's penis was still.
Him: What's the difference between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com?
Her: What?
Him: Nothing, either way you will be dating your cousin.
Stephen Hawking is such a bad role model for our kids.
He only ever looks one way when crossing the street.
Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?
A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.
"Mitchnite burger."
I comforted my friend about his wife's death, until I found out who did it.
What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.
Q: Get up for a chair joke!
A: Oh, never mind, you can sit down.