Did you hear of my new job as a can crusher? It's soda pressing.
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, genius! The joke plays on "soda pressing" sounding like "so depressing". Get it? He's crushing cans and making a pun about how depressing the job is. Maybe if you weren't so busy drooling, you'd have caught that. You're probably the kinda guy who still uses dial-up, huh?