Short jokes
Fuck y'all, orphan lives matter!
When you're a terrorist and you have a stutter.
A a a a a a a a ala ala ala ala ala alaog alaogbar.
I am the least serious person ever, but whoever is joking about cancer is vile :)
Get some fucking respect, you silly tramp!
What's the definition of a bastard?
Answer: A man with a 1 inch dick and a 10 inch tongue and all he wants to do is fuck!
Your classmate: You're so ugly.
Me: That's what your mom said when she had you and called you a mistake.
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
Bully: You are ugly.
Me: You are so fat, you are the Call of Duty map.
Do you put a baby in the microwave covered or uncovered?
Covered, it can take weeks to clean up the explosion.
What do you call an Indian man stuck in a tree?
A leaf.
Roses are red, I like burgers on a bun.
This news: family neuters furry son.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head 'n Shoulders.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
Have you seen the inside of Helen Keller's houses? She hasn't.
What happens when animals do a squat?
It doesn't become pretty...
What's the difference between crazy people and regular people?
We don't live in their heads.
What's a crazy man's favorite phrase when he has a knife?
"Freak out!"
What's a bison's favorite gun?
A PP Bizon.
What's a knife's favorite person?
The victim.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"