Short jokes
Children and your meat are actually quite similar.
At first you seem weirded out by spanking it, but later on you start to enjoy it.
🇻🇪 Finally, I am a trillionaire. Now I can buy bread.
What do you call two monkeys who share the same Amazon account? Prime mates.
Butter believe it.
I used to be a man in a woman’s body. And then I was born.
Yesterday I was in a wind storm.
Today my ears hurt. I guess the wind was ear-itating.
What do you call identical tall people? Twin Towers.
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree?
don't leave me hanging.
Are you a fire alarm because you're loud and annoying?
Why do orphans ride the bus? Because they have no parents to drop them off.
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
What do orphans like to watch? Spider-Man: Homecoming.
What's an emo's favorite game?
Limbo.
(If you don't understand the joke, go look up what Limbo is.)
Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.
Kid on Xbox: I'm not a virgin. Ask your sister.
Bully on Xbox: I don't have a sister, dumbass.
Kid on Xbox: You will in 9 months.
Why don't Mexicans like winter? They're afraid of ice.
Jada Smith: Grow some balls!
Me: Grow some hair!
What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?
Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.
You know what they say about dark humor: it hits harder than a drunk parent.
Muslim child to his mother: "Mom, why is my backpack so heavy?"
Mom: "Allahu Akbar, my son, Allahu Akbar!"