Short jokes
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
Welcome to Joe's pizza, you make 'em, we bake 'em.
"Boiled ham" is what you call a dead Russian.
"White on white crime, well ham rights crime anyway in Eastern Europe right now!"
How do you f**k a duck?
Usually duck a f**k.
Join my beta communication community committee commission Cumbria, please guys and girls and gurls. It's all inclusive b&b.
"Lock him up, you know, Trump!"
How do pedophiles get kids to suck their d**k?
They spray paint it like candy 🍬.
You just shot an unarmed man.
Well, he should have armed himself then.
Hello, anybody, I've just shot somebody. I did it on purpose.
Sometimes a depressed person is antidepression.
"Fortnite battlepass, I just shit out my ass."
Fortnite, Fortnite, did I mention Fortnite, Fortnite, Fortnite?
bals
What happened when the emo went through the self-checkout?
Two beeps went off.
9/11, also known as the day football stopped.
How to become a monkey?
Put a red dot on your forehead.
Q: What's black, white and red all over?
A: A blushing zebra? No, Michael Jackson after a Pepsi advert.
Look, an orphan, let's go beat 'em up.
Q: What's worse than f**king a 2 year old?
A: Wiping the blood off of your clown suit afterwards.
I found a key that works for every door at my school.