Sense jokes
What do orphans and Spider-Man have in common?
They both have no way home.
What is a definition of tight?
A. Putting a blind man in a round room and saying, "Your dinner's in the corner."
You smell like tap water and cornflakes.
My dog has no nose.
How does he smell?
Terrible!
I asked my friend, "Shouldn't we have 6 senses?"
He replied, "What is the 6th sense?"
"Common sense," I shot back while looking at the kid who was going to detention. "Never mind," I said.
What is blue and smells like red paint?
Blue paint.
What planets do Astronauts like to pee on?
Uranus!
(Say this out loud and it will make more sense.)
DO Not Touch - the worst thing you can read in Braille.
Once I went to a museum and overheard someone speaking to an employee for information.
"These are lying clocks; they tell how many lies a person tells."
"Oh, cool."
"This is Mother Teresa's clock; the clock hasn't moved because she never lied."
"Makes sense."
"This is Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands only moved twice, indicating he only lied twice."
"Where's Trump's clock?"
"Oh, we're using it as a ceiling fan."
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it's so true.
Sending gay men to prison makes no sense to me. I mean, you have sex with a man and then they lock you up with a bunch of other men. That would be like arresting someone for drunk driving and forcing them to become a bartender.
Do you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Neither did she.
I spy with my little eye something starting with, actually I have TWO normal eyes.
What do you call someone without a body and a nose? Nobody knows.
What is blue but smells like red paint?
Blue paint.
A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”
Does this sentence make any sense?
What does the right eye say to the left eye?
Between you and me, something smells!
You see this guy's sense, bahh? If it was a cartoon, it would be an avatar. Cause why?
Anytime he needs it most, it vanishes. 😹💔
Me: Mom, I think I need to go to the hospital.
Mom: OMG, why son?
Me: I don't know what's wrong, but every time I close my eyes, I can see.
Think about it, then spread LMAO.
There’s nothing funny about orphans, right?
Well, I guess that depends on your sense of humor.