Science jokes
How did the skeleton know it was about to rain?
"Because he felt it in his bones?"
No,
He read the weather app, you idiot.
Joker: How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
Person: Because he felt it in his bones?
Joker: He read the weather forecast, you f*cking idiot.
What did Stephen Hawking say on the stairway to heaven?
Oh, fuck! I can’t get up them.
I saw Stephen Hawking using an ATM. It is nice to see he had found someone before he shut down.
Don't trust the atoms, because they make up everything.
The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.
What's the difference between the baby I just killed and Isaac Newton?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
What did the stepbrother and stepsister do together?
Oof, mitosis!
I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!
Steven Hawking
Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?
Because he is Stephen HAWKings.
What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
His shoulder.
Yo mama so tall!!! When she wakes up from her bed, she stands up and finds NASA beside her face, and she thinks it's a fly!!!
Earlier that day...
Mars: Okay Venus, you need to stop with the puns.
Mission on space.
Mars: Moon? You okay?
Moon:...
Mars: Moon come on! Stop spacing out!
*Venus and Moon giving her the smirk*
Why did Stephen Hawking go on to Britain's Got Talent?
To sing.
The reason why Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?
As fat as Ben Dingley.
How did Stephen Hawking get up the stairway to heaven?
He didn’t, there was no lift...!
Why didn't Steven Hawkins get into fights?
'Cause he couldn't stand up for himself.
Stephen Hawking died because his wheelchair couldn’t run Windows 10.