Say jokes
Q. What did the math book say to the other math book?
A. I have too many problems.
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, "I'm cold. Are you cold?"
The other cow says, "Yeah, I'm Fresian."
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
Two guys watching a war movie at a bar are talking. One says to the other, "The Nazis starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war."
The other says, "My dad died in a camp as well... he broke his neck."
First guy says, "How did he break his neck?"
Second guy says, "He fell out of the guard tower."
A guy and a woman are walking into a forest. The woman says she is lonely. The guy then says, "Don't worry, there will be a third person in a little while."
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"
What does one boob say to the other boob?
If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.
Say "eye," smell "map," say "ness."
(I am a penis!) HA HA!
Q: What did the kid on the airplane say?
A: "Those are two nice towers right there."
When did Michael say, "This is it"?
2009.
What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?
I guess that’s a wrap!
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
What does Santa say to 3 girls in a row?
HO HO HO
What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.
What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!
What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?
Womxn
A rich man and a poor man are talking about anniversaries. The rich man got his wife a Mercedes and a diamond ring. He says if the wife does not like the ring, she can take the Mercedes and leave.
The poor man said he got his wife slippers and a dildo. He says if his wife does not like the slippers, she can go and fuck herself.
So, a guy walks into a gas station and walks to the person working and says, "Can I have a Kit Kat Chunky?" So she gets him one, and then he says, "No, I want a normal Kit Kat, you fat bitch!"
A woman goes to buy a parrot.
There is one for 200, 500, and one for 15 bucks.
She asks why the last one is so cheap.
The man at the counter says, "It used to live in a brothel/sex house."
The lady buys it anyway.
When she gets home, it says, "Fuck me, a new brothel!"
When her daughters get home, it says, "Fuck me, 2 new prozzies!"
When the father gets home, the parrot says, "Fuck me, Daryl, haven't seen you in the brothel in weeks!"
Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"