Say jokes
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
What did the titanic say as it was sinking?
I nominate all the passengers to the ice bucket challenge.
They say give a man an inch, he'll take a mile. What about women? They don't have dicks.
What did the kamikaze instructor say to the students?
"Okay guys, watch very carefully because I can only show you this demonstration once."
What did one orphan say to the other orphan?
"Robin! Jump in the Batmobile."
What did the person say to the orphan?
"Where are your parents?"
They say the first time doesn't work, third time's the charm. Ha, not!
Segma says, "32!"
Ligma Says, "And?"
Segma says, "Anding deez balls to your mouth."
When a cookie 🍪 wins a race, what will the crowd say?
“Chip Chip Hooray!”
I don't get it.
Orphans are very religious, well mostly. Statistics say that roughly 2/3 of the orphan population go to church. I mean it's the only place they can call someone "father".
A Texan and an Alaskan walk into a room, and the Alaskan says, "My state is bigger." Then the Texan says, "It won't be when it melts."
Spell 'Imap' and say 'ness' at the end.
What did the blind man say as he passed the fish stand?
"Hello Ladies!"
When the school shooter says, "Everybody get down!" and the autistic kid thinks it's Simon Says: 🙋♂️🙋♂️🙋♂️
A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."
Confucius say, female pilot who fly upside down have crack up.
Two priests walk into a store, and cops come up to them and say they’re looking for a child molester, and the priests both say, "I’ll do it!"
What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?
“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”
An ICE agent tells a Mexican that he can get his green card if he can use green, pink, and yellow correctly in a sentence. The Mexican thinks for a minute and says, "My phone goes green, green, and I pink it up and say yellow."
I’m a cashier at a grocery store, and when I’m bored, I draw on my hands with a pen. Well, this guy walks up to me and says, “You know, I got mental illnesses from drawing on myself.”
And so, without thinking, I said, “Well, I’ve already got those, so I think I’m fine...” 😳 He looked concerned. Oops lol.