Say jokes

The man says, "Can you hump me?" So the other boy says, "Bro bro bro bro bro."

Teacher says, "Okay class, today we're gonna talk about what everyone wants to be when they grow up." Little Johnny, how about you go first."

Little Jonny: "I want to be a speed bump when I grow up!"

What’s the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus?

They’re both saying “Oh my god my mom’s gonna kill me!”

What did the hairline say to the hat?

"We go way back..."

This is the true worst joke ever:

What did the person say to the other guy when he met him?

Hi!

Why did one emo say to the other?

"I like your cuts, G."

Why did people say a man had nothing? ... Because he was a-nonymous.

What did one bee say to the other bee?

"I love you, honey!"

So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"

Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"

Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"

Why the actual fuck is there drama on this website? Anyone can fake to be someone they're not and no one will know the goddamn difference. I’m just trying to look at/make jokes, and I’m getting shit from people saying, “It’s too offensive” or something like goddam. Just take that shit somewhere else. Smfh.

I was wearing a mask and told the teacher I ate her vagina. She said what? I pulled my mask down and said, "No, I said I like your hyenas." Then a kid sees me do it, but he only heard the first part, so he goes up to the teach and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight." She said, "Pull your mask down," and he pulls his mask down and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight."

A police pulls over a Mexican man trying to get into America. The Mexican man comes up with some sob story and the police say, "All right, all right ok," says the police, "I'll let you go if you can come up with a sentence that has the words green, pink, and yellow in it." The Mexican thought about it long and hard for almost 45 minutes and then the police says, "Ok ok let's hear it" after waiting impatiently. The Mexican said, "Ok ok don't rush me. I'm ready." The Mexican replied, "Ok when my phone green green, I pink it up and say Yellow!"

I see a kid crying in the park, right? So I go up to him and say, "Hey, where are your parents?" and he says, "Well, my dad left to get the milk and never came back, and my mother died in a plane crash in the Bermuda Triangle."

What did the cow say to the other cow?

Moo you fine.

When they were going around giving out brains and you thought they were saying "train," so you said, "No thanks, I’ll take the next one!" 🤣

Two pedophiles are on a beach.

One says to the other, "Move over, you're in my sun!"

I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.

Dam, sometimes when I look at my friend's head, I say, "Dam, that's a dam big head, Nick." Then he is like, "Dude, that's a literal dam."

What did the cow say to the fat pig?

Moooooooove over!

What did the hungry Dalmation say when he had some kibble?

That hit the spot!