Say jokes
Say this when showing this website to someone: "You know, it's too bad this website doesn't have a homepage."
What did the bulldozer say to the house?
"I wanna bulldoze houses!"
Why did my dad leave me and my mum?
I told him it wasn't big enough and then ran off saying, "Daddy, yeeeees!"
R. Kelly contracted COVID-19 recently. He was quoted as saying it was the first time he caught a case of anything over 18 in years.
A sister went to her brother's room and says,
"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"
"Yes, sis."
"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)
"My pet snake."
"Can I pet it?"
"Yes."
He wakes up in a hospital.
"What happened?"
"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."
"You dummy!"
"Whaaat?"
What did the fork say to the cake when he said, "I hope you get eaten?"
Fork off!
You say Alex Jones, I say Alex moans mmmmm. I like that fat, tasty big boy and his Rolex watches, mummy, he turns me on!
What did COVID say to the American?
Nothing, it just took its breath away...
What did a bee who was interested in philosophy say?
"To bee or not to bee."
What did the orphan say to the bowling ball?
"I am orphan!"
"You are bowling ball!"
Q: What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? A: Magic!
Some boy says 100000 digits of pi, and this other dude can't even remember the 1st one.
What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?
"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"
What did the dog say when he got its tail caught in the door?
"It won't be long now..."
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"
What did Jay Z say when he got pulled over?
"I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one!"
What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
"Beat it. We’re closed."
Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.
Little Johnny says: “Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room that’s been handed down from generation to generation?”
Mom replies: “Yes. What about it?”
He says: “Well, the last generation just dropped it.”
What did one tower say to the other?
Damn, you looking PLANE!