Say

Say jokes

Nut

Me: How do you say yes in Spanish? You: Si. Me: Si if these nuts fit in your mouth.

Face

Ugly face dude: Hi kiddo!

Kid: Hi kid. Leaves.

Kid turns back and says: Wait a minute, who are you?

Vase

Little Johnny says: “Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room that’s been handed down from generation to generation?”

Mom replies: “Yes. What about it?”

He says: “Well, the last generation just dropped it.”

Memes

Teacher

I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.

Fire

I lit my girlfriend on fire. I guess you could say I ignited her fire.

God

Me: Hey God, are you there? It's me, Michael.

God: *SILENCE*

Me: If any gods exist, they better say or do something this instant!

God: *SILENCE*

Orphan

What's the most motivational thing to say to an orphan? Go big or go home!

Brothel

What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?

"Beat it. We’re closed."

Rhino

Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.

Date

So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"

Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"

Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"

Nun

Two nuns in a bathtub.

One nun asks, "Where's the soap?"

The other nun says, "It sure does."