Say jokes
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? "HDMI."
What did the acorn say when it grew up?
Geometry.
(Geometry= "Gee, I'm a tree!")
My dad went to school saying dad jokes. I was embarrassed and I cried with a-dult cry.
Don't ever say your life is a joke because jokes are actually funny.
What did one ghost say to the other?
"Get a life!"
What did the bee say to the flower?
"Hey bud! When do you open?"
I would say a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't land well.
People say your body is 75% water, while mine [is] 100% full of coffee.
What did the pig say when he was in the sun?
I'm bacon.
When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"
What did the big tree say to the little one? Grow a pear!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
"I love you, honey!"
What does the chicken say when he didn't understand something?
"What hap-HENd?"
What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
What did the bull say when got hit in the special area? "Damn my bulls!" Ahahaha
I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.
Overall, I'd say my career as a photographer has been a bit of a blur.
The patient said, "When will this be over?"
The doctor said, "After you die."
The patient says, "Was that a morbid joke?"
The doctor says, "Well, um, actually, you'll die because we broke the needles and the cure."
The patient says, "Well, it's a bright day, maybe if you weren't clumsy!"
Why do orphans like going to church?
Because they actually get to say "father" for once.
Knock! Knock!
Who’s there? Control Freak. Con... OK, now you say, “Control Freak who?”