Say jokes

One day I'm walking and I saw Josh B. He's sucking balls and Marco jump[s], and we got [an] earthquake, and I say, "Yamate."

What did the salad say to the chef? LETTUCE GO!!!

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

*Aye, Matey!*

Let's say I was immortal. No matter what I did, I would be alive. But, the catch is I’m the least flexible and least strong person in the world.

Now, I get my head chopped off. What would I do? I would roll over to my headless body and figure out what it's like to suck my own dick.

Who used to say, "Who loves orange soda?" Kel loves orange soda. Yes, I do, do, do, doooo! Oh, yes! Oh, yes! Oh, yes, I dooooo! Kel Mitchell from Kenan and Kel.

What did the baseball chief say to the Orphan?

GO HOME!

What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?

He said he was awfully touched!

What did one sea say to the other sea? Nothing, it just waved.

Youtubers say like and subscribe!

What happens when an alien connects with your device?

The alien says on your device: ".-- . / - .-. .- ...- . .-.. / ..-. .-. --- -- / -- .- -. -.-- / -- .- -. -.-- / --. .- .-.. .- -..- -.-- ..."

What did the tree say when it gets horny? My wood has a splinter.

What did one tree say to another in a crisis? Don't leaf me when things get bad.

What did the bison say to his son leaving for school?

"Bye son!"

Get it? Bye son, Bison!

Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.

Son: Really?

Also 2 hours later:

Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.

Mom: Son, I-

What did mommy spider say to baby spider?

You spend too much time on the web.

What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?

"I'm not a-moosed right now."

What did the blonde say when asked if her turn signal worked?

“Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no.”

What does a Jewish man say when he sees a caricature of his face?

"We need to circumcise that one."

If someone licks your elbow, you won't feel it.

If you put your ear up to someone's leg, you can hear them say, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"

I had sex with a disabled girl. You can say I handiclapped those cheeks.