Say jokes

You go up to a bar and say, "Hi." He doesn’t look at you. You keep saying, "Hi." He says, "What?" Then you realize that he is the one that you stole his lady from, but then he doesn’t give you any drink. You say, "Why?" He screams at you and then says, "YOU'RE FIVE!"

What did the bowler say when the balls were on the lane and the pin? They said, "Strike!" 😂😂😂😂

Women be like, "Don't say that about her genitals," then makes fun of men's genitals.

When you go to a baseball game and they say, "Heads up!" and you put your head up, and the ball hits you in the head.

They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.

It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.

Tony's wife got a divorce from Tony. She said she wanted to be an independent woman.

Days later, Tony's wife had an accident. Guess who's crawling back for help. 💀

Don't say your life is a joke, because jokes got meaning.

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?

Nothing, because fish can't talk.

Some people say I'm rude, but I think I'm pretty nice because the other day I saw this kid crying on the road and I asked him where his parents were. I just love looking at an orphanage.

What does Joe Biden say to young girls when he leaves the room?

"Smell ya later!"

A guy wakes up one morning and is walking down the road, and he smells fish, and he says, "Good morning, ladies!"

If you say "slay" in my comments I will follow all of you lmao who are signed in.

What did one God say to the other?

"I will die to be a man."

What did the police say on the TV during 9/11?

"Call 911!"

The double slit experiment shows light particles are a wave that assemble in your presence. And you didn't even have to say a word!

I don't see why people say that emo kids don't like to hang out.

I've seen them hanging all day.

Was drinking in a bar with this girl when I suddenly blacked out. The next morning I received a letter saying they are processing my child benefits application, dafaq? I never had kids.

What did one tower say to the other? "Damn, you looking fly!"

What did the doctor say to the Chinese man?

"Some ting wong."

You're so fat, when you step on a scale it says, "To be continued."