Say jokes
What do you say to a crippled man getting bullied?
"Why not you stand up for yourself?"
You go up to a bar and say, "Hi." He doesn’t look at you. You keep saying, "Hi." He says, "What?" Then you realize that he is the one that you stole his lady from, but then he doesn’t give you any drink. You say, "Why?" He screams at you and then says, "YOU'RE FIVE!"
What did the bunger say to the bunger? Bunger.
Why do pirates say, "Argh my Hardees?"
Because that's how you tell when they have the hards.
Women be like, "Don't say that about her genitals," then makes fun of men's genitals.
When you go to a baseball game and they say, "Heads up!" and you put your head up, and the ball hits you in the head.
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
You're so fat, when you step on a scale it says, "To be continued."
They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"
What did one snow ❄️ man say to itself? My arm is broken.
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
What did the knife say to the other knife?
"Knife to meet you."
What does a news anchor cow say for the weekly broadcast?
"Here's the beef of the week!"
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
"Together we can stop this shit."
I am always high, welcome to bipolar disorder. LMAO. (Don't bother to like or comment, I just had to say this.)
What did the bowler say when the balls were on the lane and the pin? They said, "Strike!" 😂😂😂😂
The boyfriend says to the explosive dude: "You're the bomb!" The explosive dude says: "Wow, that was Whitty."
What do you say after making fun of a disabled person?
"Sorry, I didn't mean to step on your toes."
Tony's wife got a divorce from Tony. She said she wanted to be an independent woman.
Days later, Tony's wife had an accident. Guess who's crawling back for help. 💀