Say jokes

What did the green grape say to the purple one?

"Calm down and take a breath."

What did one orphan say to another orphan?

"Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"

What did the south tower say to the baby north tower?

"Here comes the airplane!"

What did the bus say to the other bus?

"Beep!"

What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?

"May divorce be with you."

What does a stick say when it falls down? "Wood you help me up?"

Say what you want about Hitler, but in the end, he did kill Hitler.

What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?

- Kelp!

I'll stop with the horrible puns if you can say a good joke.

How do poets say hello?

Hey, haven’t we metaphor?

What did the Ford Mustang say to the crowd of innocent people?

I'D HIT THAT!

Question: What did the fish say when he ran into the wall?

Answer: Damn!

What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?

Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"

Person: You suck!

Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎

What did one skeleton say to the other?

Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"

Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)

Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."

Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"

Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"

What did the knife say to the other knife?

"Knife to meet you."

A dung beetle walks into a bar and says to another beetle, "Is this stool taken?"

What’s the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus?

They’re both saying “Oh my god my mom’s gonna kill me!”

What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?

“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”

What does the man cheeseburger say to the girl cheeseburger?

“You got nice buns!”