Sand jokes
Wash It Away - By Bradley Lewis(watersharky) and Ben Lewis and Watersharky Music Productions - Why does it always feel like I'm the one that's had a bad day?
Whether I'm stuck in traffic or showing up to work late,
Oh this 9 to 5 feels like 9 to forever been working all week
For a jerk that thinks they can say whatever they want to me
I'll just bite my tongue for a couple more days
Soon I'll be in that island sun surfing those waves
I need the beach I love the ocean
Put my feet in the sand
Watch the earth in motion
Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day
Take it to the shoreside and wash it away
Oh yeah
You gotta wash it away
Finally I'm here and I can't even stop myself from smiling
Somebody hand me a beer and I'll check the girls on the island
Don't miss my 9 to 5
Living like a local on this island time
I got those sandy toes and nobody knows jump in the ocean and just go with the flow
I'll miss my sandy toes
I've got to go back before you know this island is my home
I need the beach I love the ocean
Put my feet in the sand
Watch the earth in motion
Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day
Take it to the shoreside and wash it away
Oh yeah
You gotta wash it away
Wash it away
I need the beach I love the ocean
Put my feet in the sand
Watch the earth in motion
Ya had a bad week ya had a bad day
Take it to the shoreside and wash it away
Oh yeah
You gotta
Wash it away
Wash it away
Anakin Skywalker: I don't like sand.
*also him*
Anakin Skywalker: I lived on sand.
Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.
I was at the beach today, and there was a big wave.
Somebody went, "Damn, that crashed harder than the Twin Towers." Jack may have survived the towers, but not the crash.
What did the other wave say to the other wave?
"Nothing, they just waved!"
I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.
What did the sea do when it saw the beach?
It waved!
Sand under docks is very resilient. It doesn’t give in to pier pressure.
Trump and Anakin Skywalker have something in common: they’ve both killed a lot of sand people.
I went to Pen Island for vacation this summer. There were a lot of bones.
Digga D, I'm a well known bandit, bandit. Had a new mash, just landed. Jheez, cop it, chop it, sand it, hand it. The verbal ting I can't stand it. Wife and two, got tanned when I banged it. Mad ting. Got a conspiracy case in the silliest Place, they're saying that I planned it, damn it. Back on a Feltham landing. You ain't been in the hood like Robin. I ride in hoods tryna leave man red (Crud). The sweets are goldy, yola drops and lots of dred (Maud). No porkies, pepper them pigeons, they chase this ped. Gyal tryna give man noddy, She ain't got balls in her tongue that's dead.
Adam and Eve were sitting on the beach one day, and Eve says to Adam, "Let's go for a swim." Adam replies, "I'm not in the mood."
She says, "Okay, I will go by myself." She puts her toes in the water and splashes around and says, "The water is beautiful, come in!" Adam replies, "Na, still not in the mood."
Eve wades into the water until she gets to her waist. Adam jumps up and yells at Eve standing waist deep and says, "Oh no, now all the fish are gonna smell like that!"
What did Cinderella wear to the beach?
Glass flippers.
What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?
You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.
What do you call an ass on a beach?
Sandy cheeks!
When Trump goes to the beach, he doesn't use suntan lotion. He uses Dorito dust, and it stays on for the rest of his life.
Wanna hear a dry joke? A desert.
Why did the rapper go to the beach?
To drop some QUICKSAND BARS.
Why doesn’t Helen Keller go to the beach?
Because she can’t hear the sea.
Donald Trump has too much sand in his vagina.