Salad jokes
Q: Why did the trans man only eat salads?
A: Because he is a "herbefore."
Why did the transgender man only eat salad?
Because he was a "her" before.
What did the cucumber say to the bell pepper that wasn't wearing enough clothes?
You need more dressing.
What do you call a cripple convention? A salad.
You telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 50 years, made this salad?
What's Juice Wrld's favorite salad? A seizure salad.
What do you call a room full of disabled people with epilepsy?
A seizure salad.
Hey guys, today's funniest prank: is when I poured a bunch of red wine into the chicken salad...to be honest, it was a TON of wine I poured in there! My family could not tell the difference at all! Anyway, bye, that's the prankster! Next time or see you next time!
Panera Bread.
Why did the cheese blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
Hey, I got some Domino's pizza, salad, breadsticks, and chicken wings for everyone. Yeah, but make sure Ms. Mandingo gorilla don't eat all up, because if she do, I'm going have to shove it up her fur.
What do you call a chicken staring at a pile of lettuce?
A chicken sees a salad.
(Say it out loud if you don't get it!)
What is big and long and hard?
A cucumber!
A goose with no beak, and you eat?
Goose beak salad, file! :)
It’s amazing just how paranoid Hitler was.
In Hitler’s Germany, it was illegal to make jokes about him or his regime.
Come on! Forbidding Germans from making jokes? Isn’t that a bit like forbidding Americans from eating salad?
What's the difference between a salad and a baby? People don't usually scream when you shake around a salad.
Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it?
The salad could be dressing!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce in.
Lettuce in who?
Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
If you think the guy calling you fat is offensive,
Try salad 🥗.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.