Religion jokes

"A llahu Aks into a bar..."

And it blows up!

Adam and Eve are wondering whether they are black or white. Eve says, "Why don't you go and ask God?"

So Adam goes into the Garden of Eden and shouts out to God, "Are we black or white?" A big booming voice bellows out, "You are what you are."

He immediately goes back to Eve and tells her that they are white. "How do you know?" asks Eve. "Because he said, 'You are what you are,'" Adam replied. "Why does that mean we are white?" asked Eve. "Because if we were black, He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"

Why do priests play Geometry Dash? Cuz they can beat Demons.

What’s the difference between you and Jesus? We know who Jesus’s dad was.

What did the priest say during the christening?

"So anyway, I started blasting!"

Why does Santa not have any children?

He only cums once a year.

Jesus Christ does exist, he does, and he is the son of God... a God that doesn't exist XD

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.

The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this – a joke?”

A person had a child named Bl, another named Es, and one named S. The next was named You. They were a very unholy family.

Their children were shamed upon because their names spell out "Bless you."

How does a Muslim close a door? He islams it.

What did the orphans do when the bombs drop?

They said, "Allahu Akbar."

You're so ugly that every time you look up in the sky, God says, "Sorry, can't help you."

What's the difference between Jesus and Christmas tree lights?

They can both flash.

Your mama is so old, she made a book bigger than the Bible about her life.

I was talking to a close friend that was Islamic.

He said he was being shipped to an amazing training.

I asked, "Where are you going?"

He said, "Camp Bin Laden."

I asked, "What do they do there?"

He answered, "They got bomb training and hand to hand combat training. Plus they got arts and crafts."

I asked, "What do you mean by arts and crafts?"

He said, "See this towel on my head?" I nodded. "I made it out of boxer jokes."

Hi, my name is Meer Adnan Hussain. I am a Muslim. I live in Karachi, an area of Pakistan. I want this job. I am interested in this work. Please take me in this work. Your porn star, Meer Adnan Hussain. Wait for your email. Okay.

How does Jesus whistle? Through the hole in his hand.

What do you get when you cross a Muslim in a trench coat and a duffel bag?

A sad news story.

What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.

Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have?

Palm Sunday.