Religion jokes

When the priest said, "Be gone from this boy, demon!" the demon replied, "And you get out of the boy!"

I dated an Indian girl for about six months. She was always Sikhing attention.

What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?

Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!

Q: What do priests do to stay in shape?

A: They exorcise.

What's the difference between Christian theocrats and Islamic fundamentalists?

Presentation.

What is the best Catholic dating app?

Grinder.

What’s black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.

Did you hear about the streaker in church? He was caught by the organ.

Two ropes meet. They ask each other, "Why are you wearing a hijab?" The other replies, "I want to go into the water now."

What's the difference between a priest and a rabbi? A rabbi cuts it off, a priest sucks it off.

Jesus walks into a motel, puts three nails on the counter, and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"

Hi, my name is Meer Adnan Hussain. I am a Muslim. I live in Karachi, an area of Pakistan. I want this job. I am interested in this work. Please take me in this work. Your porn star, Meer Adnan Hussain. Wait for your email. Okay.

How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?

Are you 7/11 or 9/11?

You'd think with Jason being a pastor's kid, his parents would have gotten him Invisalign.

And an exorcism.

Why did Catholic women stop going to church?

Because it takes Jesus three days to rise.

What was Jesus's favorite sport?

Lacrosse.

What’s a reverse exorcism?

It’s when the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?

Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.