Religion

Religion jokes

Man

    • Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.

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    • Man

    • How do you keep a homophobic heterosexual man that is a minister and a Christian nationalist with blond hair in suspense?

    Wait until Christmas to take away his church's tax-exempt status or he will call the ACLU.

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    • Man

    • A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself, and his friend says, "Find God, he'll help you!"

    Then the man said, "There’s only one way to get to God, and that is through Jesus. Have you, my friend, found him?"

    Priest

    • The priest wanted the little boy to touch his cross. The boy said, "It's hard." Then it shot out holy water, and the priest said, "Come again and taste the second cumming of Jesus, lmao."

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    • Religion memes

    Phrase

    • The phrase “Muslim women live in one of the hottest countries in the world and they can’t even expose their legs” has two meanings.

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    • Drunk

    • A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.

    He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"

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    • Nun

    • What's black and white and can't turn around in a corridor?

    A nun with a javelin through her neck.

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