Religion jokes
What’s black and white and red all over?
A crushed nun!
What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?
Slow natives.
Why [does] a tranny say "Have a good day" to a Jew?
He [is a] goy.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
Why did the orphans go to the church?
Because they need someone to call "father."
So I went to the gym and I found a hymn.
You could say ancient Egyptians and JDM car fans are alike--they both worship Datsun.
Did you know that lots of graves are put in churchyards?
Yeah, they're pretty holey.
ICH BIN GOTT.
"Nun" means no one likes them. Just take off that dumb hood!
Where do terrorists go for food? The Allah snack bar.
Reverend Mother walks into the convent and announces:
"Sisters, our carrots have been delivered!"
Nuns exclaim: "Hurray! Carrots!"
Reverend Mother: "They are grated carrots, though."
Nuns: "Ugh! No, thank you then..."
What’s the difference between a Catholic and a rabbit?
One has kids to protect from predators, and the other has kids for predators.
Repeat after me: Die angle; die angle; sweetie. Angels don't die! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
The dear God created the man.
Then he created woman.
When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
Poultry rape is no joke. It is God's gift to those who want a laugh.
I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.
Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.
For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.
Yo mama so ugly, when she go to church they say it's a demon!
What happens at the orphanage be like:
The orphans: “HE IS THE MESSIAH!”