Religion jokes
Did you hear about the streaker in church? He was caught by the organ.
What’s the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One kneels for salvation.
The other kneels with salivation.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One reads, the other breeds.
What's the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One is glowing and the other is blowing.
Yo mama so fat that she would die before reaching the gates of heaven.
What’s the difference between a Catholic and a rabbit?
One has kids to protect from predators, and the other has kids for predators.
Repeat after me: Die angle; die angle; sweetie. Angels don't die! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Poultry rape is no joke. It is God's gift to those who want a laugh.
"Nun" means no one likes them. Just take off that dumb hood!
What's the difference between 5% of priests and 5% of atheists?
5% of atheists have seen a ghost.
5% of priests have spooked altar boys in the sacristy.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
Reverend Mother walks into the convent and announces:
"Sisters, our carrots have been delivered!"
Nuns exclaim: "Hurray! Carrots!"
Reverend Mother: "They are grated carrots, though."
Nuns: "Ugh! No, thank you then..."
A hunter shot holes into his favorite book.
When confronted, he said it was the "holey" Bible!
You should always wash your sex toys. That’s why priests invented baptism.
The dear God created the man.
Then he created woman.
When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
What did God say when he made the first black man?
"Crap, I burnt one!"
What’s black and white and red all over?
A crushed nun!
What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?
Slow natives.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
Why [does] a tranny say "Have a good day" to a Jew?
He [is a] goy.