Religion jokes

The priest had a very holy shirt.

Why do orphans go to church?

To call someone "father."

What did the priest say during the christening?

"So anyway, I started blasting!"

I am sure this was the type of economy Judas Iscariot was in when he betrayed Jesus.

What does McDonald's and priests have in common?

They put their meat inside 10 year olds.

Your hairline is so far away that Jesus could've seen it when he was on the cross.

Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.

Yo mama so ugly, when she go to church they say it's a demon!

Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?

A: They both love naughty souls.

If I was God, my parents would be anesthetists.

God, you’re having a good day?

Me: Yes, beats burning in hell.

What do you call a priest meeting his illegal children?

A holy CUMmunion.

You should always wash your sex toys. That’s why priests invented baptism.

Your mama is so ugly.

The Buddhist monks broke their vow of silence.

Allah akbar.

I love bread so much that I might join a bread cult.

Your mama is so fat, even God couldn't raise her spirit.

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of him?

Well, it only takes one nail.

God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.

People of Earth: *running and screaming*

Santen: *to God* Really?

What is a similarity between priests and doctors?

They both have fetishes for their professions.