Relationship

Relationship jokes

Doctor

Why did the doctor turn the orphan down?

Because he is a family doctor.

Wife

My wife told me to hang her the salt, so I beat the shit out of her. My name's Kyle, by the way.

Putin

Did you hear Biden went to the ER?

He's having a little trouble with his Putin.

Memes

Maria

Just a pickup line.

"Ayo, bbg, are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in."

Love

Prince, do you love that girl Gwen more than me? Remember when you were at my house?

Sex

How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.

Penis

Penis ➕ ➕ ➕ 🕳

inside 🚹 🚹 restroom

equals 😋 🍌 🍌 🍌 inside

glory 🕳

Super glue

My wife told me to pass her some chapstick, but then I realized she hasn’t talked to me in a month, then remembering I gave her super glue.........ehh I’m done with her big ass mouth.

Autopsy

My wife walked in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."

Love

Dear Kenya, love of life,

Thanks for commenting on my jokes, and thanks for being a nice person to me! Love, Jaden. You can tell by the emojis 🥰😍❤️💞!

Love you a million times more!

Fault

"-JuicyFruitSnacks- A whole lot of pepper and a whole lot of salt. If I blame it on my friends, it won't be my fault."

-Mully- This is my mom left!!

Dick

What do a Rubik's cube and a dick have in common? The more you play with them, the harder they get.

Wife

A man walked into a bar with an AK-47 with a 50-round mag and yelled out, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" Everyone was quiet.

One man at the back stood up and called, "Sorry mate, but I don't think you have enough bullets."