Relationship jokes

What color is Sonic's ball?

Blue because he keeps getting rejected.

"Cummy wummy all over my mummy."

Okay, boys are known to measure their dicks, but do girls measure their depths?

*walks into sex shop*

Hello. I would like to buy 1 sex, please.

Yo, little sister, pussy taste so GOOD on my TONGUE!

What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?

A misfit.

Who wants to be my boyfriend?

Wait, since I'm underage from having sex, what is it like?

Yo momma's so fat that she got married to diabetes!

Me: Do you know a funny joke?

Friend: Yes, you.

What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?

Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.

I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.

Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was and pointed to me. I pushed him out of the car, and my other boyfriend took the front seat.

Boy/girl: I love you.

Me: I love me too! But sorry, my mom said I can't date trash. Go back to the trashcan.

The boy/girl: I- *Is depressed*

Gwen pegs Xavier.

Boy and girl.

Boys af sex wus ur girl?

Boy: "Mister, can I get candy?"

Mister: No, you shit head.

Boy: Why? :(

Mister: Because I'm not your dad.

It's this girl named Deaf, what a weird name, but I know that 'cause I was ear hustling.

But anyway, everytime I call her, she doesn't answer. I wanna clap some cheeks tonight, how could she hate me when she don't know me?

Your mom's like a candy machine; she pops out for anybody.

When the guy asks the girl if she's wet, she replies, "Yeah, milky knickers!"

Hey, I broke up with your girl.

-Me: What? Why?

Wait, what?

-Me: You f**ked her, so it's your baby.