I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"
Relationship Jokes
What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?
I don't have a sex slave in my basement...
My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!
Don't break girls' hearts. Break their legs instead. They're two.
"Go frick a cow!"
"I already fricked your mother."
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
My girlfriend didn't bring me the sandwich, so I brought the gas.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
Why can't orphans be gay? They don't know their daddy.
What do you call 2 emos making out in a science classroom?
My Chemical Romance.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
I tried to have phone sex once.
But the holes were too small.
Kid on Xbox: I'm not a virgin. Ask your sister.
Bully on Xbox: I don't have a sister, dumbass.
Kid on Xbox: You will in 9 months.
She left, and now I support women's rights. I will kill her.
Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?
Todoroki POV: All he can think about is Deku.
Why do orphans like to have sex?
So they can finally have someone to call "daddy."
Are you adopted?
No.
I mean, who would want you?
Daddy, harder!
What's the difference between a boomerang and your dad?
Boomerangs come back.
