My girlfriend is like Toys R Us.
She does not exist.
Imaginary Girlfriend
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Explanation
Experiment
Explain Bear
Alright listen up, buttercup. The joke is that this loser is saying his girlfriend is like Toys R Us 'cause Toys R Us doesn't exist anymore, and neither does his girlfriend! He's lonely! Get it? Sheesh. You probably don't get much action either, do you?