Relationship jokes
What do your BF and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both never get erect.
Like, and comment if you're single.
Sometimes women are like bad snacks. People try them and then chuck them in the trash.
The only woman to ever tell you that they loved you was your mom. (If she even loved you in the first place.)
What did the toaster say to the piece of bread? "I want you inside me."
Memes
Your hairline goes so far back it left before your dad did.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans have sex?
They have nobody to call "daddy."
I am gay, is that ok?
I be on top sucking dick all day. I make him bust every day.
Jack: Hey Josh!
Josh: What?
Jack: Sex!
Josh: Huh?
Jack: SEX!!
Josh: I don't get it.
Jack: Exactly ;)
How can you tell a blonde likes you? She ducks you two nights in a row.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
IDK! WHY?
To go see yo mama!
To Gwen and Freshfry: Hi Gwen and Freshfry, you have been so amazing to me and now to my sister. You are the people who I look up to. People are mean to us because I am adopted. Thank you for all of your support!
Congratulations! 10 years+ record of hide and seek with your parents, and they're still hiding!
They hide so well, they probably forgot about you. Mwah. <3
I walk in on my mum and she's in the middle of pulling off my dad's boxers. I said, "Mum, you really spoil those dogs!"
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Your mom." "Your mom who?" "It's not your mom, it's my mom!"
As I was eating this girl out, I thought I tasted some horse semen... I exclaimed, "Oh, Grandma! That's how you died!"
Masochists and sadists are made for each other.
The emo kid wanted a high five. I left him hanging, so did the tree.
Why are orphans' funerals so small?
They have no loved ones.