Relationship jokes

Dating a girl and studying mathematics, both give a headache.

Why don't chickens and sheep get along?

Because they have beef between them.

Husband: Hey, my dear, this lunch is great. Where did you find the recipe?

Wife: In a detective novel.

Friend A: "Why are you still a virgin, bro?"

Friend B: "I was until last night."

Friend A: "Nah, nah, who with?"

Friend B: "Your sister."

Friend A: "I don't have a sister."

Friend B: "Just wait 9 months, you'll see."

Do you have a halo?

'Cause I can give it to you.

The other day my girlfriend asked me to hand her the red lipstick, so I handed her the dog.

He: "I love you."

Me: "I love myself too."

I sit because I can't stand you.

What did the melon say to the avocado when he proposed?

Can't elope.

What do you call Holly and Elenji?

A couple.

I like my dynamite like I like my woman: hot and ready to explode.

I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday. Let's just say I quit my job as a butcher.

Ur mom gay.

My family.

What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.

I love friends.

They don't have parents because they left when you were 0.

I love you, Hebrew John.

The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!

I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I’m joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.

Why do orphans love tennis? It's the only love they get.

In tennis, 0 points is love.