Relationship jokes

Do you have a halo?

'Cause I can give it to you.

Some kid online: I f*cked your mom.

Me, an orphan: Jokes on you, I don’t have one!

Your mum lolololollollollololollolololllol! Find her reboot card lmfao lolololol.

I was walking this hot girl home, then she noticed me, then the walk turned into a run.

A white guy was telling his friend about this girl he hooked up with. His friend asks, "Did you get her number?"

He replies, "No, but it's okay, I'll see her at the next family reunion!"

I was talking to my old friend. They said, "We should hang out more!"

I said, "You mean we should ketchup?"

My mom told me that she and the owner of a Chinese restaurant made a deal. Now we get free Chinese food. So I ask my mom why do we get free Chinese food? Then my mom said, "I love him long time."

Who likes penis?

My cousin!

I fell in love with my teacher.

Which is weird because I am home schooled.

Sister.

Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.

Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was pegged.

"Guess what my wife left in the freezer?"

"Her miscarriage."

My gf told me she was pregnant. So I punched her in the stomach.

She asked me "Why the hell did you do that?!?!?" "I wanted to let you know I'm pro abortion."

I told my mom I'm happy and she said: "I didn't know you were gay."

Todoroki POV: Deku = femboy.

Deku POV: Todoroki = big 8=====D.

I was going to give my wife chocolates, but my fat friends ate them.

Wife: "You don't even have friends!"

What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?

Go fuck yourself!

Who do you call in times of a marriage crisis? A prostitute, because your wife fucking sucks.

Are you a bowling ball? Because I want to stick 3 fingers in you.

Ur Granny, tranny.

Ur Dad, lesbian.

Ur Mom, gay.