I realized that a really bad joke and my life are the exact same thing.
I laugh when I realized that my suicide letter is way more longer than my sibling's college essay.
Orphans around my area only watched Youtube Shorts. I asked them and then realized they can't click the home button.
One day, I was walking through a park when I realized it was crowded.
To this day, I still don't know who let the children out of my basement.
when you unplug the charger to charge your phone, but you realize it was plugged into your grandpa's life support:
You realize your in a parodox,until you die,you’ll see yourself die,Murder,Suicide,Old Age,Etc Then your realize your dreaming,but you realize that you die in a dream you die irl
Sometimes, I think back on all the mistakes I've ever made.
Then I realize "My daughter isn't THAT bad..."
Today, I dreamt about giving head to Johnny Depp. Then I woke up and realized that I forgot to roll my windows up when passing through the New Jersey Turnpike.
A guy wins a free ticket to the Super Bowl and so he’s very excited.
However, he’s not so excited when he gets there and realizes his seat’s in the back of the stadium.
So he looks around him for a better seat, and to his surprise he finds an empty seat right next to the field.
He approaches the older guy who’s sitting in the seat next to the empty one and asks if the seat is taken.
The man replies, “No.”
The young guy is very surprised to hear this and asks, “How could someone pass up a seat like this?”
The older guy replies, “It’s my wife’s seat. We’ve been to every Super Bowl together since the day we were married but she’s passed away.”
“Oh, how sad,” the young guy says, taken aback. “I’m sorry to hear that, but couldn’t you find a friend or relative to come with you?”
“No,” the man replies, “They’re all at the funeral.”
bro my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse. The other day he said he couldnt hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...
I’ve always been a bit insecure about having thicker thighs.
Now I realize it allows me to fit more scars!
I was on an orphans website, but I pressed on his profile and realized he had no home page
Once my dad left to get milk then I realized we own a cow.
Last week I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a BALL. I wondered where it came from but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you Penaldo for almost killing me!
most poeple don't realize this, but the F in orphan, stands for family.
ha! it asked me submit a joke but then i realized im the joke
I was laughing my ass off when the 12 year old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival 🤣🤣🤣
i was playing laser tag with my ex, but i (wink) didn't realize i had a real gun
All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something. Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.
