Paradox jokes
I’ve never had Indonesian food. Huh...
Neither have they.(:
Who comes when an orphan gets married? They are allowed back in family restaurants, but when I go in alone, I'm not allowed. I have some parents, for God's sake!
If you have a broken bone, do you have broken skin?
I'm a gay depressed person. Would that make me a happy unhappy person?
"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War.
You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!
If you wait for a woman to get 9 months pregnant and kill her, you will never be able to stop the loop.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
Make sense of what I am saying, This is a LIE—and that's the TRUTH.
What am I?
Answer: a Riddle.
The next sentence is telling the truth. The previous sentence is telling a lie.
If a heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from another heterosexual man at a glory hole, it's called a "brojob", but if a homophobic heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from a gay man at a glory hole, it's still called a "brojob". Does it cycle now?
Chuck Norris can toss Jupiter at the Sun with his bare hands.
And he still cannot win a fighting match against Bruce Lee.
The barman says, "We don't serve time travelers in here."
A time traveler walks into a bar.
Why do trannies have such high rates of suicide?
Because they want everyone to accept them, but they can't accept themselves.
I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.
Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.
So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?
Why were the twin towers actually twins?
Their birth and death date are the same!
We're all unique, which is something we all have in common.
One woman said to the other, "This child is truly cruel!"
The second woman replied, "Did I say 'child'?"
The first woman said, "I beg your pardon; I didn't know you were my father!"
when is it normal to freeze before being raped?
when a policeman rapes you.
In Soviet Russia,
You love Chinese and hate Chinese.