Question jokes

Why is the rum gone?

TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?

My cousin: the other half.

A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."

One time my dad was an orphan, so I questioned where he learned to parent.

Q: What did Chris Brown say when he first saw Rhianna?

A: I'd hit that.

What happens when you cross a rhetorical question with a joke?

What do you say to a depressed special kid?

“Why so down?”

I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?

Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!

What do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked?

Someone: Ugly?

Me: No, trick question, they are still an orphan.

Gwen, why are you so nice?

One day, little Johnny woke up to get a drink of water. He passed by his parents' bedroom and noticed sheets bouncing. He asked his dad what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." Little Johnny said, "Who is your partner?" Dad said, "Your mom." On his way up, he passed by his sister's room and noticed sheets bouncing around and asked what she’s doing. She said, "Playing cards with my boyfriend, Paul." The next day, Dad came to ask Johnny a question. The father noticed Johnny was still in bed and asked him what he was doing. He saw the sheet bouncing and asked Johnny what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." His dad asked him who his partner was. Little Johnny said, "You don’t need a partner if you have a good hand."

My dad told me that his dreams were shattered a few years ago.

Then I asked him how many years ago.

He replied with, "When were you born?"

That moment when you have to ask your Chinese neighbor if he's seen your cat.

I hate it when people are at my house and ask, "Do you have a bathroom?" What answer are they expecting? "No, we pee in the yard?"

How many animals can jump higher than a skyscraper? -- All of them, skyscrapers can't jump.

Top tip; if your wife asks, "What would you like to do to my body?" 'Identify it' is the wrong answer.

Hi, everyone. Serious question. Would it be illegal to decapitate a worm? Asking for a friend, he's so worried we're going to jail. I'm not. I'm fine. Please reply fast.

A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?"

He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor!"

Dad, am I adopted?

NO! Why would I ever choose you?

What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."