Put jokes
What happens when you have dry elbows at work?
You don't have any elbow grease to put into it.
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
Why can’t you take an Asian guy golfing? Because you can’t drive. Every time he does, he tries to put a hole-in-one.
Marriage is really educational.
When I was single, I didn't even know there was a wrong way to put a fork in the dishwasher.
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
Who would've known?
What’s 9 inches long and makes my girlfriend scream?
One inch and put it in her. Her miscarriage.
My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight.
I told her to keep her chins up.
If you were a room in my house, I’d make you the basement.
So I could put kids inside you.
I put the fun in funeral.
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
Your teeth are so yellow, when you smile, you put the sun out of business.
I put this joke so the amount of jokes will be 69. Also, I have 50 kids in my basement. I fed "Twinkies" last night.
Yo mama so stupid, she put a battery up her a** and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"
My favorite thing to do in libraries is put cookbooks in the women’s sports section.
I was reading a great book about an immortal dog the other day.
It was impossible to put down.
Yo mamma so fat, she asked for a water bed, and they put a blanket over the Atlantic Ocean.
It’s about drive, it’s about power, We stay hungry, we devour, Put in the work, put in hours, And take what’s ours.
She said she was cheating. I put anti-freeze in her drink.
Your forehead is so big that when you put glasses on top of your head, it falls off.
Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.