Baseball

Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).

1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.

3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.

4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.

5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!

6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."

7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.

Door

Pretend you are an old man who is 77 years old and there are 7 doors, which door should you pick?

The seventh door.

Tree

Q: Why didn't the Oak tree win the election?

A: He didn't get the votes he was oaking for, because he was not the popular vote.

Mint

When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"

Clock

What did the clock say when it got punched at noon?

It’s twelve o'clock.

Song

My son asked me to stop singing Oasis songs in public. I said maybe.

Butter

Did you hear the rumors about butter?

Never mind—you shouldn't spread them.

Chicken

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: Because chickens are mindless creatures and do not know any better.