Mint

Mint Jokes

A women decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday She spends $15,000 and looks sensational. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, ‘I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?”.

’About 32,’ is the reply.’

‘Nope! I’m exactly 50,’ the woman says happily.<br> A little while later she goes into McDonald’s and asks the counter girl the very same question.

The girl replies, ‘I’d guess about 29.’ The woman replies with a big smile, ‘Nope, I’m 50.’

Now she’s feeling really good about herself. She stops at a candy shop on her way down the street.

She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the assistant the same burning question.

The clerk responds, ‘Oh, I’d say 30.’

Again she proudly responds, ‘I’m 50, but thank you!’

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.

He replies, ‘Lady, I’m 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra Then, and only then I can tell you EXACTLY how old you are.’

They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the better of her. She finally blurts out, ‘What the hell, go ahead.’

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, ‘Okay, okay.....How old am I?’

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, ‘Madam, you are 50.’

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, ‘That was incredible, how could you tell?’

‘I was behind you at McDonalds’.

A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied “okay cool now I’m going to go sue thin mints for not making me thin.”

Hi guys the prankster is backster!

I was gone for a long time because of this bullying about a nice sweet girl named gwen! So my 6th prank is on...

When I put some bad stuff in my sisters tooth past bottle!

Okay so I took some smelly mints from the jelly bean game! I had molded cheese jelly bean, molded milk, and worms jelly bean! Jelly bean tastying is this game where weird tasted jelly beans are in there so I got some mints and putted it there! Then next thing you new was! My sassy ass sister had her breath smelling like a chimpanzes buttock!

badminton: your breath is so BAD that you have to take a MINT before you go ON fortnite

by john rizk

I hope all of you had a great merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a good whatever you celebrate! I got so much this year, over $300 of fishing gear, a small 2011 coin mint collection, some coins from the Nazi party, a remote control car, 100 dollars, and more. Say what you guys got in the comments