Predator jokes
Are you a gun, because I would be your bullets because I love going in children.
The cheetah had a race with a lion, and the cheetah won.
The lion was like, "Why you always a cheetah?"
The cheetah was like, "Why you always lion (lying)?"
[god creating alligators]
God: See that log?
Angel: Yes...?
God: Now fill it with teeth.
Angel: Say again?
God: FILL IT WITH TEETH!
What do pedophiles call children in wheelchairs?
"Meals on Wheels."
Why do sharks never attack lawyers? -- Professional courtesy.
Memes
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
A child and a child molester walk into a forest together. The child turns to the molester and says, "Boy, these woods are scary." The molester says to the child, "You think you're scared? I have to walk out of here alone."
Why was the cheetah so bad at hide and seek?
No matter where she hid, she was always spotted.
Q. If I go 1 on 1 with Harvey Weinstein, I won't get raped?
A. I'm not a 14-year-old girl.
Roses are red, I have free candy, get in my van, I have a gun handy.
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.
When is a rapist safe around children?
When his plans are oven ready.
What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia?
Sexy kids.
How did the cheetah greet other animals?
Cheetah: "Nice to eat you."
Where do pedophiles go hunting?
Elementary schools.
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?
He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
Why did the homeless man stop to help the kids cross the street?
To get them into his van.
I like my clocks like I like people.
Under 12.
If a lion ate a child, is the lion a child predator?
What do you get when you goblin with a shark?