Plant jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, If I had a gun, I'd shoot you.
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears! :3
Where were the first orange trees 🍊🌳 planted?
In Orange County.
Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
What did the tree say to his sister? Wood you please leaf me alone, you son of a birch?
I talked to a future suicide bomber. I told him, "ISIS ain't got sh** on me because I planted a bomb and lived."
Why did the dwarf laugh when he walked on the field?
The grass was tickling his balls.
Grass for lash.
I fucking love rhubarbs.
Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.
What flowers are on your face?
My family is like a cactus; a bunch of pricks.
What does a baby banana call her mum? Na na, get it? Instead of ma ma.
What was the oak tree's response to the apple tree's joke?
You should leaf it alone!
My depressed mom looks good hanging from a tree.
Save the plants, eat a vegan.
A woman went into her garden and danced in front of her vegetables.
The next morning, her corn didn’t grow, and the tomatoes didn’t blush or turn red, but the cucumbers grew four inches.
There's an old lady doing gardening every year. Nothing grows. She goes to the man who lives next door. She says, "How do you get your tomatoes so big and red?" He tells her, "You show them your privates at night time." So she leaves. That night later, she goes outside and shows the garden her privates. The next day she's got zucchinis a meter long!
What is the difference between a car and a tree?
A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.