Why are trees afraid of dogs? Because they bark.
Plant Jokes
What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this one's gonna blow!
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to garden?
Lil Plant
My plants in my garden are like the Twin Towers; neither of them fell, just the flowers.
Here's a good tree joke to spruce up your day!
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
What did one bean say to the other bean?
How you bean?
Did the leaf or the emo fall out of the tree? The leaf won. The rope stopped the emo.
What did one nut say to the other nut? "Help!"
What happens when you see corn looking at you in your window?
A corn stalk!
What is the difference between a human and a tree?
And walk, walk home, and...
Why can’t a tree have sex? They are always tied up.
What do you call grass that grows in space?
Astro-turf.
What did the corn say to the flying apple?
"That's corny."
What do you call a gay cactus?
A "prick."
You wanna know what I have in common with an apple?
We BOTH look good hanging in a tree.
9 people walked into Bunnings Warehouse.
2 people bought plants.
3 people bought shovels.
1 person yelled.
3 people left Bunnings Warehouse.
1 person was me. I guess those three people are fired! 💁♀️🤦♀️
What does a baby banana call her mum? Na na, get it? Instead of ma ma.
Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?
Why did the sick juice tree go to the hospital? Because it needed lemin-ade (not the cool type of sick, the one where you are in the hospital). Lemin-ade 1st ade.
