Why do japenees people hate I phones because there scared that American air drop will fall on it
so i walked into my bathroom to clean some stuff and no one ever told me you cant put put phones in the bathtub
yo mama so fat she stand on the scale and the scale says: i want your weight no your phone number
how do you call a cop
thru the phone
(my puns are bad)
Parents: why do you use your phone on the toilet? Me: the same reason you read the newspaper on the toilet
me, calls the police* me: hey imma commit suicide! cop on the phone: please wait till we get there me: why, so you can then stop me? cop on the phone: no, we just want a murder, not a suicidal report on your paper...and we are all bord! me: ok, my house number is ********************* ok! cop on the phone: awesome! just a sec. whispers*** guys I finally found someone who wants to get killed!
Me:911 I just killed someone Cops:Cool we will not come Me:Why Cops:Don't admit a crime. Phones:*Bang Bang* Me:Well that was 2 crimes done.
Why did steaphen hawkings died. Because his son wanted to charge there phone so they unplugged him
1. If being ugly was a crime you would have a life sentence
2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships
3. There is a tree out there giving you oxegyn, and you owe that tree an apology.
4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.
5. When I saw your dad on the side walk I didn’t laugh but the sidewalk cracked up.
6. If I had powers I would make you the dumbest person alive but it seems life already beat me to the punch.
7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it
8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart I’d be broke.
9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting
10. Were you born on a highway cuz that’s where most accidents happen
11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya
12. Your the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented
Mexicans words of the day: Green, Pink, and Yellow :))
The phone go green green... I pink it up and say YELLOW!!??
So i ment up to a Australia girls she look like 20 and i said can i have you phone number sweet heart she saod 696969 i said oh habha ok a few days later her mother called me and said she 15
My grandpa asked me to pass him his phone but i passed him a calculator, he couldn't tell the difference.
Phone Rings; Are your parents home? Orphan; Stop calling here.
what is thanosis fravrete app on his phone
Your mom is so old she walked into an antique store and they kept her
Your mom is so dumb she called me asking for my phone #
I asked my phone why I could get a date. It showed up a picture of my self
