Personal jokes
When does a dyslexic person know when they've spelt their address wrong?
When it fails to turn up.
What do you call a black person having a fit?
A chocolate milkshake.
Person: So, Jimmy, what do you do all day?
Jimmy Savile: Anyone who I can do.
What’s an autistic person's favorite movie:
A Quiet Place?
What do you call a person with a flip flop?
My dad.
What do you call a black person scuba diving? A black diver (an armor set from DeepWoken). Did anyone laugh at that, or?? Augh, I guess I'm alone.
What do you call a transgender person in a wheelchair?
An Autobot.
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
I work in a garage, and yesterday a gay person came up to me and said, "Why won't my car go straight?"
What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?
Dry Vegetable.
I was watching The Conjuring with an emo person. She said she likes the part where the girl was hanging. I said, "Why? Because you wish it were you?"
God: You're gonna have 2 parents.
Orphan: Double it and give it to the next person.
How do you kill a spider?
Just get an autistic person.
If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
More random keyboard words made into sentences:
This was a joke that was made by someone who had never been to the game before, but who was the first person to make it into a game of game with the intention of being able to play the first person who played it.
What do you call a disabled person in a sauna?
Steamed veggies!
What do me and a blind person have in common after I look at Alfie's mum?
We're both blind.
How did the fat person cross the road?
It rolled.
How do you make a sad person jump?
A bridge.