Perception jokes
Me: Hey, say I am ugly for a billion pounds.
Them: You're ugly.
Me: Sorry, I am not a mirror.
Dark humor is like food: Not everybody gets it.
What did Stevie Wonder see when he got murdered?
Nothing.
Dark jokes are just like water.
Not everybody gets it.
Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"
Memes
If I were in a staring contest with you, I would be looking at a rainbow.
Once a naked woman robs a bank, but sadly, no one can remember her face...
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
You're so skinny, you swallowed a meatball and thought you were pregnant!
What does a person that’s high and Helen Keller have in common?
Both stare off into space.
Déjà Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
Guess who I saw at school today?
Everyone I looked at. loooooooool
When I went to the doctor, he pulled his wife in and said, "What do you see?"
I replied, "A fat bitch." He said, "Ok, your eyesight is perfect."
You're so damn ugly that the robbers only go into your house to close the blinds.
They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.
It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.
I think I'm colorblind. News came out of purple.
Purple.
Luckily for you, mirrors can't talk, and luckily for you, they can't laugh either.
What does the blind man say when walking past the fish market?
“Good evening, ladies.”
"I spy with my little eye..."
- Noting I am blind -