Perception

Perception jokes

Mirror

Today when I looked in the mirror, I stopped and simply said: "It's ok, what's inside matters the most, right?"

Fish Market

A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”

Schizophrenic

Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"

My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.

Memes

Guy

Guys, stop making jokes about blind people, they might s... never mind, continue.

Orphan

What do you call an orphan in a room full of mirrors? Surrounded by loved ones.

Mirror

My biggest joke: I’d show you, but I don’t have a mirror to show you.

Breath

Just letting you know if people cry when they see you, that doesn't mean they miss you. That means they're scared of your onion breath.

Husband

Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.

Wife: Aww, thanks.

Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.

Kid

There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.

She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."

Son said, "But I can't see."

Mom said, "That's the point."

Beauty

Beautiful people should read this quote: "God gave you beauty but not brains."

Mama

Your mama so fat, when Pennywise said, "We all float down here," he saw her and suddenly knew he was mistaken.

Gender

If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.

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  • Color

    If you're going shopping at school, what color would I like to smell: True or False?

    Child

    What is it about a beard and glasses that children find so sexy?

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  • Eagle

    How are a bald eagle and a bald man similar?

    Because they both have eyes.

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