People jokes

Why do Chinese people hate Christmas? Because they make the toys.

What’s the best part about sex with twenty eight year olds?

There are twenty of them.

I started a new job. My boss said, "Hi, my name is Rebecca, but people call me Becky." I said, "My name is Kyle, but people call me Dick."

She said, "How do you get Dick from Kyle?" I replied, "You just ask nicely."

What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?

A mass murderer.

What do you call an apartment full of Black people?

A crackhouse.

What's the difference between a joke and the Twin Towers? People don't laugh at my jokes.

Why do black people only have nightmares?

Because the last one to have a dream got shot. (Martin Luther King joke)

Fat people are the reason we have double doors.

My friend was in a crash, so when he got put in a wheelchair, people bullied him, so I told him to stand up for himself.

What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.

Do you know what's in common between a hitman and a photographer?

They all shoot people for a living.

People: Stop invading Ukraine!

Putin: Ukraine? you mean Mykraine.

I would like to say Hitler gave two fucks about his people.

But quite Anne frankly, I'd be lying.

I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.

Here are some rules to make a good joke:

1: Don't say “my life.”

2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.

3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).

People told Kobe to fly high. Look what happened.

A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat. He is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with, "What do you mean? I already did it." Then the police ran back to the school to apprehend the other people he was planning it with. The cops busted in through the doors, which caused a smoke trap to go off, which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear, the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles, 4 per pole. Back at the station, holding the kid being apprehended, the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said, "Aww, it pays to be lazy!"

What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

"If we don’t get some support people will think we are ball sacks..."

Who says white people can't jump?

Have you seen the 911 footage?

How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb in the middle of the night?

I don't know, I can never see them.

Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed.