People jokes

I know 5 fat people, and your mama is 4 of them.

It's funny how you feel so alone with depression, and yet once you tell people on some random website, so many people relate. Unfortunately, it doesn't stop the loneliness.

People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.

What is the difference between a dwarf and a midget?

Very little.

I don’t see why emo kids don’t like to hang around.

I see them hang all day.

Just hire some people to be fake parents and print off an adoption paper. On April Fools', just leave them there at the orphanage! APRIL FOOLS!

I wish that people would stop mailing jokes about Kobe Bryant. Guys, all they do is crash and burn!

What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?

A mass murderer.

What do you call an apartment full of Black people?

A crackhouse.

I started a new job. My boss said, "Hi, my name is Rebecca, but people call me Becky." I said, "My name is Kyle, but people call me Dick."

She said, "How do you get Dick from Kyle?" I replied, "You just ask nicely."

What’s the best part about sex with twenty eight year olds?

There are twenty of them.

What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.

If I'm racist to everybody, am I even racist?

Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.

In reality, I like killing myself.

Why do Chinese people hate Christmas? Because they make the toys.

What do Spider-Man and suicidal people have in common?

They both hang.

Why do black people only have nightmares?

Because the last one to have a dream got shot. (Martin Luther King joke)

My friend was in a crash, so when he got put in a wheelchair, people bullied him, so I told him to stand up for himself.

Imagine if on April first the government says, "Hahhaha, you all fell for it. Covid-19 is fake; we actually killed all those people, lol."

Jeff, did you hear they're making a film about Jimmy Savile? It’s a very touchy subject.

Yeah, I did, Gary, but did you hear the reviews on the Bill Cosby film? People said it was so boring it put them to sleep.