A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a door, and a staircase.
Call me an escalator because I let people down.
God: “Steven, join us.”
*sees the staircase to heaven*
Steven: “Shit.”
Why go across the street when you can just go down the hall, lol?
Why was the staircase so sad?
Because everyone walks on them.
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
What’s Steven Hawkins' favorite song?
"Highway to Hell" because it’s a staircase to heaven.
Say this to your significant other (or your weird friends!)
Are you an unsafe staircase? 'Cause you look like you could use a railing.
Man, I’m so sorry that Stephen Hawking is dead; he was such a good person.
Too bad it’s a staircase to Heaven and not a ramp.
What world record did the people in 9/11 get?
The world record for going down 80 floors in a matter of seconds.
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven? Because it’s a staircase, not a ramp.
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They roll a coin down the staircase and it says, "Ching chang chong..."
What's black and at the top of a staircase?
Not Stephen Hawking.
