Penis jokes

I have more cum in one testicle than you have in your whole penis.

Penis gay be like: among sussy, ding ding ding ding ding ding di di ding.

Imposter is SuS!?

What did the man's dick say to the man?

I just can't "hand"le it!

When you tell your friend he’s a simp and isn’t offended, say it stands for sucking intensely at monkeys' penises.

What does a Rubik's cube and a penis have in common?

The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

Why is life like penises?

Women make it hard.

I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...

Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...

I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...

When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.

An acronym for penis is Proton-enhanced nuclear induction spectroscopy. So just remember, the word "nuclear" is part of a penis.

I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.

What's the similarity between Christmas stuffing and my penis?

I like them both inside dead animals, because alive animals feel too much like men, and then I'd cum too quick.

Life is like a penis. It is short.

Three boys are in the 4th grade; one is black, one is white, and the other is Hispanic. Who has the biggest penis?

The black one... he's 13!

One day there were these 3 cowboys sitting next to a fire and they were telling each other about their adventures. Well, the first cowboy said, "I tangled with a bull that killed 6 people, so I wrestled that son of a bitch to the ground with my bare hands."

The second cowboy said, "That's nothing. Yesterday I was walking on a trail and came across a rattler, so I picked it up, bit its head off, and drank all his venom in one gulp."

The third cowboy remained quiet, stirring the embers of the fire with his penis.

Penis, cheese, butt, cum.

What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common?

The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

Walk into the club like, "Wow, I got a big penis!"

I go to Venice to get a bigger penis.

A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis. Her mom said, "You should have asked me last night. It was at the tip of my tongue."

America get pranked lol.

Biden's penis is probably as big as the Twin Towers right now.

Oh wait...

I was in class doing sex education. We were learning about sexual stereotypes.

My teacher turns to the class and asks, "If anyone could tell him what a sexual stereotype was?"

So I raised my hand and said, "Asians have small penis." He looked at me and said, "Very good, but I was looking for a definition."