Otherness jokes

What's the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo?

One is gigantic, the other is just a little lighter.

What did the tower say to the other one?

I will see you later; I am about to get hit.

What's the difference between me and a knife?

One has a point, and the other doesn't.

Yo mama so poor that when she went to KFC, she had to lick other people's fingers.

What do us emos all have in common?

Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."

What do two priests say to each other when they walk into an orphanage?

"Let us pray."

What did one slave owner say to the other slave owner when he couldn’t find his slave?

Don’t worry, I’ll rope him in.

What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?

One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.

What did one shark say to the other while eating a clownfish?

Yo mama's so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.

Guy: You won't eat a human, so why do you eat meat?

Other Guy: It is bold of you to think I won't eat a human.

I made a website for orphans the other day... it doesn’t have a home page.

I tried to eat a clock the other day.

It was very time consuming.

Two cows in a field.

One says to the other, "Mooooooo!"

The other says, "Tut, I was gonna say that!"

What did one droplet say to the other?

"Water you thinking?"

Q: What does a cat have that no other animal has?

A: Kittens.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Phew, it's hot in here." The other muffin says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"

How do you stop a baby from crawling on the floor?

Nail one hand to the ground...

How do you stop it from crawling in circles? Nail the other hand to the floor.

The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.

Person 1 says to Person 2: "I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith."

So Person 2 says to Person 1: "What's the name of his other leg?"