A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other and a desk strapped to his back. A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying "I'm arresting you for impersonating an office, sir"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose. She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.
What do orphans and tvs have in common? At least one of them have a home
A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself and his friend says "Find God he'll help you!" and than the man said “There’s only one way to get to God and that is through Jesus. Have you, my friend, found him?”
Another one bites the dust
Did you hear the one about the hills? It was hillarious
Why is it you donate one kidney you're a hero but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
Why can’t an orphan be gay because they have no one to call daddy
Man: I know how to please a woman. Woman: Then please leave me alone.
Man: I want to give myself to you. Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.
Man: Your hair color is fabulous. Woman: Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store.
Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Go back to sleep.
Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: Yes, I want you to leave.
Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter. -OR- Stop.
Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.
Man: What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? Woman: I hate you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.
A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building which one will land first?
The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions
What did the cow say when it saw the farmer twice in one day? -- "Deja moo!"
*bowl of dark grapes* Friend 1: I like my grapes how I like my men Friend 2: Black? Good one Friend 1: 21 at a time
Why did Michael Jackson rush over to K-Mart one morning 🌄? Because he heard little boys 👦 pants 👖 were half off!
Two cows were hiding.One said:"Moooo" The other one said:"Shut up! We're hiding!"
what’s the difference between jesus and maddie mccann one had the last supper
What's better than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten!
why is the orphans keep going back to the orphan home, because they got no home to go to yeah pls like this and laugh because i got no one to read this
One day a cow ate a fish
what came out the other side?
A dead fish.
One day little johnny went to his grandma's house and she asks "do you like nuts" and little johnny says "yes i like nuts" and his grandma says "okay then grab them out of the cabinet" so little johnny went and grabbed them and he was sad after he grabbed them his grandma then says "whats wrong?" little johnny says "i thought they were real nuts." and his grandma fainted.
