One jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she made a joke, only one person laughed at it: the pavement. It was absolutely cracking up!
What's a benefit of being an orphan?
No one makes yo mama jokes to you.
The Twin Towers ordered a sesame bagel. They got the plane one instead.
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
This is how big cats were named.
"I HATE BIG CATS. THAT ONE IS A LIAR, THAT ONE IS A CHEATER. THE ONE IS A POO-MA."
"Lion. Cheetah. Puma. You're getting a promotion."
Why did Severus Snape cross the road wearing an invisibility cloak?
So no one would know what side he was on.
This bitch got mad at me because I couldnβt last four strokes. What the fuck are you mad at me for? My grandpa didnβt even survive one.
"My dick fell off in the shower!" suddenly a bright flash of white lights. You see God smiling at you. "Joseph, where is your wiener, little one?" He says, chuckling lightly.
There are a lot of upsides to being an orphan.
For one, you never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
Two terrorists walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What can I get you?"
The terrorists both say, "A beer."
The bartender overhears them talking about how they will kill 300 people and a donkey. The bartender says, "Why a donkey?"
One terrorist says, "See, I told you no one would care about the people!"
Quote of the day: It's never too late to be what you wished you were.
Hope y'all are having a great day! I just got back from a volleyball tournament that I had to be up at 5 AM for! We played three games and won the last one. We advanced and are playing a few more tomorrow. Wish me and my team good luck!
Why was the homeless lady only wearing one sock?
She started her period.
Hello, I am School Shooter Memes. For the last month I made School Shooter Jokes on the site, so now I want you guys to vote for the best one. It will be in a quarterfinal format with the 8 of them being the most liked. I will link all of the polls in the comments so make sure to vote for your favourite joke.
There are Three Sons: Journey, Korean, and Little Joe. They were trapped on a floating island, and a priest gave them each one wish.
The first son wished to go back to the ground. The Second Son wished to go back to the ground. The third son was lonely and wished for his two brothers to come back to the floating island.
Two guys watching a war movie at a bar are talking. One says to the other, "The Nazis starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war."
The other says, "My dad died in a camp as well... he broke his neck."
First guy says, "How did he break his neck?"
Second guy says, "He fell out of the guard tower."
So I was at a restaurant and I really hit it off with the waitress, so one thing led to another and I'm at her place and she was really nice at the IHOP but when I was there with her she was all like "ahhh! what are you doing!?!?!? how did you get in my house?!?!?" and then she punched me and I'm the one who ended up in prison.
What's the difference between a porn star and a mosquito?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
Hey, you have something on your chin, no the 3rd one down.
Your mama so ugly, when Santa Claus came to her house and saw her, he said, "HO HO HOLY SHIT THAT'S ONE UGLY BITCH!"
One of the most popular documentaries of the 2010βs was βJiro Dreams of Sushi.β
One of the least popular documentaries was βJiroβs Nightmare of Ass-Rape.β