One

One jokes

Difference

What's the difference between you, your uncle, and your dad?

One didn't go in the closet.

Mama

Yo mama so ugly, she made One Direction go the other direction.

Religion

There's only one reason our Education Minister is standing by this curriculum.

In her religion, you NEVER pull out.

Memes

Bean

Green beans, potato salad with the one that was in the fridge for me.

Priest

What does a child molester and a Catholic priest have in common? They both prey at church.

Orphan

One day an orphan threw a boomerang, but it came back, just like its parents.

Orphan

What's the one school event that orphans don't go to?

Parents' evening.

Nut

Thing 1: What's the difference between nuts and almonds?

Thing 2: I don't know, what?

Thing 1: One gets hard faster.

Digit

Some boy says 100000 digits of pi, and this other dude can't even remember the 1st one.

Pane

What did the window say to the door?

"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"

Get it?

Head

What has one head, one foot, and four legs? A: A bed.

Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!

Q: How many letters are in the alphabet? A: 11. A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.

Monster

Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.

Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.

There's like a weird after taste though.

Kinda like a sparkling water one.

I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.