One jokes
One day, this dad and his son went to a basketball factory, and the son said, "I want to buy some balls." The dad said, "What for?" The son said, "So you can have some balls."
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.
What's the difference between the Christ and Anti-Christ? The Romans put sugar syrup on the second one.
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, "OH! THE HUMANATEE!"
What's worse than finding one dead baby in a bin? Finding one dead baby in five bins.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pig?
There isn't one; they are both the same thing.
C'mon guys, I know I'm not the only bored one around here!
Comedian: If you’re racist and you know it, clap your hands.
Guy 1 & Guy 2: 👏👏
Comedian: WTF bros!
Comedian: And one of you is black and one is white. How does that work?
Yo mama so fat, One Punch Man had to punch 3 times.
Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.
What do Donald Trump and a dick have in common?
Liberals can't keep either one out of their mouths.
Yo mama so fat that she broke the scale when she put one foot on it.
How many brain cells does a pregnant blonde have?
Two, one for her and one for the baby.
A man is sitting on a bench at a playground where children are playing. A man named Chris comes up and asks, “Which one is yours?” The man said, “I don’t know, I’m still deciding.”
If 4 birds are sitting on a fence and one gets shot, how many are still on the fence?
None, the rest fly away.
One day Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?” Little Mary says, “The teacher is very intelligent.” The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?” Little Suzie says, “They are very fashionable.” The teacher says, “Johnny, why don’t you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence.” Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy, ‘Darling, how does my dick taste?’”
One weekend some distant family members that I hadn't met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn't met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).
My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes and told me they both ended up dying.
Well, SO-RRY, but I didn't know they were conjoined twins.
One time I ate a chair.
One day, a cop pulls a van over, and when he walks up to the window, he sees ten penguins in the back.
The cop asks the man, “Are those your penguins?”
The man says, “Yes, they are my pets.”
The cop replies to the man, “You need to take them to the zoo right now.”
So the man agrees and drives off. The next day, the cop pulls over the same van, and he walks up to the window and sees the ten penguins all wearing sunglasses.
The cop says to the man, “I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo.”
The man says, “I did! Today, we are going to the beach!”
Me: Knock knock.
Person: Who's there?
Me: No-one.
Person: No-one who?
Me:...........