Number jokes
One day, little Sally hears the phone ringing. She picks it up.
"Hello, this is daddy, Sally. Is your mom nearby?"
Sally says, "No, she's upstairs with Uncle John."
"Uncle John? I don't know an Uncle John."
"No, no, no, you must be mistaken, daddy."
"No, I'm sure there's no one named Uncle John in our family."
"Okay, but why did you call?" Says Sally.
"Ummm, no reason, just tell mommy that daddy's pulling into the driveway right now."
"Okay daddy!"
*long pause*
"Okay daddy! I did it!"
"Great job Sally! What did she say?"
"Mommy said OH FU.. and then she ran around with no clothes on and tripped on the carpet and hit her head on the bookshelf. She's now resting it looks like... then Uncle John screams and jumps out the window into the swimming pool, but of course we took all the water out this winter..."
Then dad replies "Swimming pool? We don't have a... is this 468-1843?"
Why is 69 annoying me? Oh, it's a tease.
What’s the best thing about fucking twenty-eight year olds?
There’s twenty of them!
Why is 6 scared of 7? 7 8 9.
Seven ate nine.
1 and 2 fell in love. The 2 said, "You're the only 1 for me!"
Why is the number 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
I asked my friend what their serial number was... He said "Cheerios."
I get knocked down, but I get up again, as long as I have 46 chromosomes.
What does e equal?
I don’t know, a bunch of random numbers, but e=mc2.
Why was 6 so afraid of 7?
7 killed 6's parents.
8008135 is my favorite number.
The worst ratio is 6:9.
And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?" Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together, you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six, too.
Why is 7 afraid of 6?
Because 7 is a vegetarian and 6 is a cannibal.
Why was six scared of seven? Because seven ate nine.
What would a clock look like with no numbers?
Timeless!
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
What's the good thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's twenty of them!
Why don't people play hide-and-seek in the number 4?
Because it would take forever. Get it? "For-ever" and "4" four, so "four ever."
How many dead kittens does it take to clog a pool filter? Seven when I tried!
What’s the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds?
There’s twenty of them.
Why was six afraid of seven?
Because seven is a registered six offender.